I Am Not Their Savior

About three years ago I watched a short video in my Human Development class at BYU. The film showed footage of an orphanage in Romania where dozens of children lived. The conditions were poor and there were not enough workers to care for all of the children. They were neglected and underfed.

That’s when the dream started. I dreamed of going to that place to care for those children. I wanted to free them from the life that they were living and give them something more. I dreamed of holding them and rocking them and singing them family lullabies. I felt that my love would be enough to change their lives forever.

I finally made it to Romania this summer, planning to live the dream I had created years ago. Almost two months ago I went to the orphanage for the first time. The people of Romania have worked hard over the last couple of decades to improve the conditions of the institutions in their country. The orphanage is now much nicer and there are wonderful workers there who dedicate much of their lives to helping these children.

While important improvements have been made, the children in the orphanage are still desperate for love and attention. When I first arrived here I naively assumed that my love and care would change these children forever. I thought that I would somehow be able to lift them from this sad life they had been given.

I had the same picture for the children in the hospital.

Each day we go to a local children’s hospital and care for children who have been abandoned by their parents or whose families live far away and cannot stay there with them. There are, on average, about fifteen children each day. We change a lot of diapers, hold sick infants, blow bubbles, color in coloring books, change clothes, and try to make the children smile.

Again, when I first started working at the hospital I thought that I was going to change the lives of these children.

The longer I am here I realize that this is not necessarily the case. What we are doing here in Romania is important and definitely helpful.

But I am not their Savior.

There is someone who can take away all of the pain that these children feel, but it isn’t me. There is someone who will lift them from their current situation and fill their lives with light, but it isn’t me. There is someone who will love them unconditionally every second of every day that they live, but it isn’t me. It is Him.

Jesus Christ is the only one who can truly save these children. They have been given so little and their lives seem so empty but I know that Jesus Christ is, very literally, their Savior.

John 16: 33 “… In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

I do not know why these children have had to live their lives without families. I do not understand why a mother would abandon her child. I do not know why these precious children must suffer so much because of the choices of others. But I do know that Christ will not forget them or abandon them.

Isaiah 49:15-16

 “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? Yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee.”

“Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me.”

I know that Christ is aware of the children in this small orphanage in Romania. I know that he is aware of every child in the hospital. He loves them dearly. Someday they will be with Him and they will experience the joy and love and light that were not given to them here.

Now, does that negate everything that we have done and are doing here? Does that mean that none of us should ever try to help others because there isn’t really much we can do anyway?

Heavens no. We do all that we can. We try to live our lives as Christ would. As believers, we have a responsibility to spread His love and light.

I plan to give my whole heart to these children. I plan to love them all day every day while I am here. I know that what we are doing here is making a difference. We are giving these children a small piece of the love that a family would provide. We are doing what we can to care for their physical and emotional needs. That is important.

For three months the lives of these children will be a little different than usual. They will get more kisses than usual and they will spend more time in the arms of people who love them. That is a gift worth giving.

But in the end, it is Christ who will truly save these children. 

And I know that He will.